‘Celebrities’ to run marathon
Rest of marathon to run faster.
It’s marathon time again, and that means all manner of ‘celebrities’ are going to be on the front line to show that they care about charity causes, like spina bifida in white whales and the increase of pattern baldness in seagulls.
Three of the cast of The Only Way Is Essex will be running. Apparently their names are James Argent, Cara Kilbey and Billi Mucklow – not that any of those names sound familiar as humans I have heard of. If they want to be remembered after the show ends (which it has to… eventually..) they should pick new names like Twatty Fuckpie and Cockface Spunktoes.
Alex Reid, who is also someone I’ve never heard of is excited. He said:
“I have always wanted to run a marathon. I knew about the Battle of Marathon and enjoy classical history, so taking part in a marathon myself really captured my imagination.”
Right. Because running a marathon is EXACTLY like the Battle of Marathon.
Newsreader Sophie Raworth is apparently going to be taking part, and she sometimes looks like this and lets passers by touch her boobs – so I guess that’ll make the marathon more interesting.
Allure convinces celebrities to strip,
is now in running for Nobel prize.
It’s basically summer, and yet everyone is wearing far too many clothes, don’t you think? Luckily Allure is here to save the day once again, and convince another selection of delectable hotties to unrobe, disrobe, and derobe for the camera.
This year’s collective of ladies includes Firefly / Homeland’s Morena Baccarin, and Iron Man / GCB star Leslie Bibb, both of whom look much better without clothes on.
Although try to tell that to their faces, and soon you’ll find yourself evicted from the premises. But you probably shouldn’t have been in their bedroom anyway.
Is that the news?
THAT IS THE NEWS.