Celebrity News – February 18th

Whitney dead, Pat Buchanan an asshole

 

 

 

 

 

Pat Buchanan fired,
Rest of world goes on unchanged

That's MISTER cunt to you

Pat Buchanan: Disney-in-training

Buchanan, host of something somewhere, was fired for being a racist, homophobic, anti-Semitic asshole.

Fair enough, I hear you say, but he had only been portraying the role of a giant doosh in the hope of winning the coveted Walt Disney A-like award, which is handed out to hateful cockshitting spunkholes every year, on the first of Cuntober; the day of Disney’s birth.

 

Shortly after his firing, Buchanan posted this song on his blog:

“This is the greatest song of all time, about the greatest man of all time.  I look forward to the freedom my firing will bring, allowing me to spend more time on each and every one of the activities mentioned in the ditty.
Also, I hate Jews, black and gays. Have a good weekend!”

He may or may not have said.

 

 Whitney Houston dead,
Crack sales plummet.

Perfectly healthy and ready for her close up...

Huston, 7 days after her death.

 

The dead diva’s burial attracted celebrities from all over the show, from other singers and actors to professional racist bumhole Mel Gibson, and parking attendants that once sung on American Idol.

The entire service was live streamed because MTV realised if they put on any more reruns of Jersey Shore the entire population of The United States would die of televisually transmitted STDs. TVSTDs, if you will.

 

 

Absolutely nothing else has happened this week.  Fuck celebrities for being boring over the last seven days.

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